Richard Noggin

 Just a quick introduction and we will begin. I am Richard Noggin (Combination of the French Name Richard, meaning "Dick", and the German word Noggin, meaning "Head"). I am a simple man with definite views of the world and my place in it. This Lens is meant to be nothing more than an entertaining series of random thoughts expressing my opinions.The only real intent is for us to become acquainted. I am not deliberately setting out to offend anyone so don't get your panties in a twist. Just keep in mind that I am not the supreme voice of any group or culture. I don believe that I know more than most or that I matter more than anyone else in the grand scheme of things. I do matter more than most to those who love me and for my family and friends I am eternally thankful to the good Lord above. This all being said, let us get to know one another.
.
I know what you are thinking; don't I know a Richard Noggin? The answer is an astounding YES! You probably parked next to him sometime this week. He was the guy who dinged your car door or parked so close that you had to get in from the passenger side of the car. You may have sat next to him on the bus. You can always tell him from other passengers because he isn't content to mind his own business. You probably even ran into him at the checkout line of the local store. You know, the Richard Knoggin who held up the 20 items or less express line with a shopping cart full of TV dinners and beer. Everyone at one time or another has either known or worked with or is related to at LEAST one Richard Noggin. In fact, Richard Noggin is much more common than John Smith or Jane Doe. Which brings me to my next point, Richard Noggin doesn't have to be a man. Throughout history, there have been some very prominent women Richard Noggins (although they mostly go by a different nickname than the men).

Yes, Richard Noggins are very common indeed. We are the plumbers that fix your sinks and school teachers that you trust your children to. We work in hospitals saving lives and on horse ranches, uh ... ranching horses. We drive trucks on the open road and are the very politicians that you kind hearted people voted into office. Richard Noggins are especially adept in politics. We, the Richard Noggins of the world are everywhere. This doesn't mean that I not proud to be a Richard Noggin. Quite the contrary, I am one of the most successful Richard Noggins in my neighborhood. Ask any of the little punks that roam the area, wasting their precious youth on video games and God knows what else. Just ask them where a Richard Noggin lives and they will direct you to my house.

The same goes for the old farts in town, they know me. I have shouted my opinion from behind the steering wheel at most of them, one time or another. It seems that for no other reason than to piss me off, they drive 5 miles under the legal speed limit. It's a speed limit for goodness sake! Not an unattainable goal like those wrinkled up oldies having sex without the benefit of modern pharmaceuticals! At some point they need to realize that they have even less time to get where they are going than I do! I know speed kills, but when my hair turns blue, I going to be in a damn hurry to get somewhere! I will know that I almost out of time and will try to get everything done before death grabs me by the short hairs!

Then of course there are the baby factories that insist on troubling society with their pathetic versions of "Eight Is Enough" They can't successfully control one child in the local Wal-mart and yet they think it's a good idea to have at least three more! These are the geniuses that have no clue what Planned Parenthood is about, and yet they just keep on having unprotected sex!

Yes, I am Richard Noggin, known to many. I have made it my business to tell you and the rest of the world your business. If you don't like my opinion, get over it! It's mine and I have every right to have it and to force the rest of the world to listen to it. Unlike most Richards, I am not so self absorbed that I am unconcerned about you. After all, I did say that I wanted to become acquainted, didn't I? So, please feel free to comment below. I will not remove comments unless they are based on hate, prejudice or meant to belittle or hurt other people. You can say what you want about me, it's not like Richard Noggins are known for their sensitivity. I look forward to hearing from you and hope that you enjoy my future ranting. Until next time remember, "You are your own worst enemy" but Richard Noggins make a fine runner up!

Don't Forget to follow my commentary at http://squidoo.com/Richard_Noggin